The men in my family were work addicts and women were anger addicts.

My mom and her mom were forever locked in a verbal battle over money, raising us kids, the relatives, basically anything. And occasionally they would act insane, & become obsessive over the smallest things. And I was always caught in the middle –the person who had to listen to Mom criticize Grandma, and Grandma snipe at me because she was upset at Mom or herself or the situation or whatever. I was the one absorbing all the tension, trying to calm things down and restore some sanity, but I didn’t know what was going on.Amber Deann (It was the beginning of my journey to being a counselor.)

And I was the one who took  the beatings from Mom when she erupted spontaneously, and had to hear the belittlement’s, and criticism from Mom.

As a child I never knew why everyone was acting so crazy. It put me in survival mode. I never felt secure & safe.  I was physically sick and sick of the arguing.

Finally  in my 30′s I started to explore the cause of my problems, my low self esteem, my lack of personal identity, etc. It took several years but I finally figured  out the family dynamics. And it boils down to this–

Imagine a very unhappy woman who felt so unhappy with her life and trapped that she felt like a hurricane was materializing inside her and all she could do was vent emotionally, mentally  and physically.

Years later I realized what an impact Mom’s anger and distress had on my self esteem, and my self identity.  It caused all types of health issues, problems finding the right jobs, finding my self identity, my skills and interests. I was really lost.

The advice I needed then is the essence of the program I am designing right now. The benefits of my coaching is– Stand up, Be Powerful and Speak your wisdom.


I made a decision to find myself and put me together.  This meant finding my identity, my skills, my interests, changing my self talk, repairing my self esteem, and creating a self image. It took a number of years in which I explored many self healing modalities before I could change my life.

I have figured out a way to shift my lifestyle faster, easier and  make permanent changes in my relationships .I also found a way to give myself   the support and love I needed.

Now I can connect to a supportive community of others, really talk to and hear others, feel my self value, and do my life mission effectively.

Now I can show others the way. The pain of a dysfunctional family had turned into the blessing of a new ME and a new career.

Pin It on Pinterest